Life Is Good! (Because You've Decided It Is Good)
Change your outlook; change your life.
Could living a long and happy Third Act be as simple as deciding you want to? More and more studies are saying just that. For a while, now, we’ve known that being optimistic about our retirement years helps us have more of them. For instance, in one study by pnas, women in the highest versus lowest optimism quartile had 14.9% longer life span. Findings were similar in men. But new studies are emerging that are saying you will not only live a longer life, but a healthier one as well, if you are generally looking forward to what is ahead. Researchers aren’t sure why. Theories sort of center around being more proactive about your health if you are happy with your life and want it to go on for quite a while longer. That makes sense, but also, intuitively, if you like your life and are looking forward to the future, you’re probably going to be doing a lot of things that help with health, like getting out there and moving your body and connecting with people and trying new things. And it’s not just physical health that is better. The Irish Longitudinal Study on Aging (TILDA) at Trinity College Dublin found that negative attitudes about aging affect both physical and cognitive health in your later years. Study participants who held positive attitudes towards aging had improved cognitive ability as they aged and improved emotional wellbeing, as well. A longer, healthier, more alert, happier Third Act? Sign me up!
That ain’t me
OK, great, but isn’t optimism an inherited trait? Are you doomed if your parents weren’t the most optimistic people on the planet? Turns out you’re not. It seems that only about 25% of your proclivity toward either optimism or pessimism is inherited. The rest is learned, so it can also be unlearned or re-learned. It may take some doing, but concerted effort can “turn that frown upside down” more often than not, and the more you do it, the more it becomes… just… you.
Not acting, but taking action
The whole “fake it till you make” it thing only goes so far in this space, though. You can’t pretend to be optimistic and expect to be optimistic. So, what can you do? There’s a theory out there that says that optimism “is guided by the strength of an individual’s desire to reach a goal (value) and their confidence in achieving that goal (expectancy)” (Scheier & Carver, 1992). So, step one for an optimistic, healthy, happy retirement? Have some goals! You don’t have to reach all of your goals. You just have to believe that you can. And if the goals change over time? No problem! So long as you have them and you are looking forward to achieving them, magic! Long, happy, healthy retirement.
I like to set my goals up around the pillars, of course. I have some goals for my writing (purpose). I have a whole calendar of activities for the summer (FUN!). I have a rough idea of my budget and I track it (Financial). Believe it or not (and I don’t suggest this for everyone), I have a spreadsheet where I track things like exercise and nutrition and even how many glasses of water I drink (wellness) and I try to make sure that I communicate with at least three family members or friends every day and set up things to do with them on a fairly regular basis (connections). I also have long term goals in each of these areas that I reflect on from time to time, like growing my writing platforms and walking a half marathon each year. I don’t necessarily advocate having goals in every single pillar. I do, however, advocate having something you are living for - a goal or a value and probably more than one is better. And make it something you are pretty darn sure you can achieve and not just something someone else wants you to achieve.
Your turn!
So, this is the fun part! What awesome thing does your Third Act have in store for you? Will you set up a neighborhood watch? How about learning to play the guitar or cook gourmet meals? Oh! Maybe it’s visiting all 50 states. Coaching little league? Getting your photographs published? Literally ANY goal is a good goal and they are imperative for having not only a long lifespan, but a long healthspan and a Rockin’ Third Act! Reply to this email. Tell me what your goals are. I’m excited to hear them!